Countdown to the Gay Games - Pride

Week 15

This week marks a milestone - 20 miles. In the 18 week program it is the longest stretch that one will run before raceday. The upside is the overwhelming accomplishment. I mean, c'mon. I average somewhere between a nine and a ten minute mile. That means running consistently for anywhere from 3 - 3 1/2 hours. If you work a 9-5 job, that is the time between the start of your day and lunch break. It's crazy when you think of it. The downside is that it still isn't a full marathon and there is always the looming question of whether you truly will be able to complete the race. When it all comes down to it, will you fall short of the finish.

I have to say that these last few weeks have been tough. I've had a lot on my mind, a lot of tasks and travelling, little motivation to run. The summer weather has been unforgiving with temps in the 80's by 0900. For long runs like last week, getting up at 5am has been a necessity to avoid the heat and humidity of Midwest June. And I have to say, this week I told myself that whatever happens, I'll be happy with how far I've come over the last four months.

But then, I stopped myself.

June is Pride month for most people and places. It represents a celebration of who we are and what we have accomplished. But it is also a reminder of what we still have ahead. Last weekend, I had the pleasure of spending Pride in Minneapolis with my dear friends Nancy and JP. We danced at Twilight, listened to freestyle vocals at Jet Set, watched the parade, visited the park, and met gobs of cool people. I drank too much, flirted with a hottie hipster, kissed a lesbian, and laughed at the general straight reaction to so many gay people in one place. I also got the funny idea that at some point, gay people should rebel against marriage equality. I mean, why should we want to be equals, we should want more. We should want better ceremonies, stronger ties, longer lasting "I do's", cooler "forevers", swankier divorces. Why should we settle for what they have. And maybe Pride should last all year long. OK, seriously.

My point is that it is easy to enjoy the momentum that we have created - to sit back and say "whatever happens, I'll be happy with how far I've come." But sometimes, you have to push through. You have to remember that there are six more miles left in the race. And it's OK to be proud of running 20 miles. But isn't it better to be proud of finishing? It's OK to be proud of who you are. But isn't it better to be proud of who you could be?

Week 14